A poem of love

A Poem Of Love - Unknown Sender February/14/2019 10:29pm
When hearts are tender,
They skip a beat,
Longing for comfort,
A soul so sweet,

Candied kisses lined in a single row ,
Broken hearted,
It is now sown,

Caressing whispers along neck and ear,
Something joyous,
Now no more a tear,

Handled gently,
Just soft and slow,
Hold me closer,
And please don't go!





Please check my other blog posts for my symbolic related views, and other random posts!

Stay strong!

Into the void my mind seems scattered,
Hold myself when I feel emotionally battered,
Stronger then I ever thought I could be,
No matter where life's seems to land me,
I hold my own,
I stand firm,
Can't let them knock us down,
That's what I've learned,
About others, but mostly about myself,
Because a lot of us are very similar,
We all feel doubt,
We all get broken, and most of us climb back up,
Even at those vulnerable moments when someone screams to shut up,
This love I bury deep inside,
I'd love to let it fully flow,
Maybe to help someone learn to love themselves,
Or maybe to help me to wipe myself clean from all the untrust clouded with doubt.

I had been holding things back for so long, and I feel these words can describe such feelings trapped within. I hope it helps others in some way, as I know others too can probably relate!
Please check my other blog posts for my symbolic related views, and other random posts!

Some poetry

The great wind blows,
At night,
The storm settles in,
And cancels flights,

The great wind echoes,
Through the walls,
Of an old apartment building ill equipped for the brutal storm,
And sends chilling drafts through the halls,

The great wind chimes,
The trees,
As they sway and the branches sing,
And the icicles fly every-which-way like prisoner's set free,

The great wind whistles,
Through the windows,
Of an abandoned building,
And now filled with over-grown thistles,

Can you feel it?
Are you listening?
Can you see it?
Can you hear?

Please check my other blog posts for my symbolic related views, and other random posts!

Without using a computer for quite some time...

So here I am.
You're all probably wondering where I have been.

The thing is time passes in life and life does often get busy. And passes it does, as time...It waits for no one!
My time frame is off, by quite a bit if you might notice from past postings of blogs and such...as it is.
Issues arise, conflicts arrive as well. And I just haven't found too much time to get on a computer to post. I have also been contemplating getting back to my symbols studies (no not posting them, actually studying them) I feel that calling again, in a most urgency of ways as of late.
I am not sure if I shared the fact that I am a published author(besides blogging I might add), and I have had some crop ups of messages that people don't know this of myself and felt I may as well state so. For the record, and so people can get that out of their heads that I haven't. Not that, that is very important to me! Not greatly so anyway.
So on to my calling of studies that I myself and probably others reading this, know why it's even needed. Perhaps my symbols on paper (which I have not shared!) would maybe shed some light on the why's.
I needed to stop in and post something as I have noticed, January was my last post and it is now the month of April.
I hope you are all well and that maybe Parts of the world would stop getting so mad(I wish) and arguing about who has the biggest bombs!
Why can't things just be civil? Why can't things be resolved? Why are things always getting out of hand and leading out of context?
Why do things that can be settled so easily with communication end up leading to such distraction? I'm saddened by it all!!!
Wishing everyone happiness and peace, Blessings to all and I hope things get cleared up (though I have a bad feeling they wont before it's too late), so that people can see things for what they are and be clear headed for a change.
The mind is a noisy place as it is.



Please check my other blog posts for my symbolic related views, and other random posts!

Life and emotional attachments! And a shared dream from long ago.

Life and emotional attachments!
Days are going by, I'm living, but still have this vague stagnant feeling within me that craves to go do something.
That being said, I'm somewhat, what they consider a closet case. I don't consider myself to be such, but I stay somewhat feeling trapped on decisions on what to do next. Now I don't want to sound crazy, but I always seem to do so. So here is what I "propose"....

I'm waiting things out until I figure things out in order to "do what I set out to do"!?!

So I like to stay home, not because I am lazy, but because I have these voices shouting from everywhere that I shouldn't venture elsewhere because of some impending doom that lurks on the outside. I do the greatest of my ability to ignore this, but as of late...That seems to be getting closer to me than I'd like to admit. Perhaps it's some kind of criminal mind in hiding and waiting for me? Or maybe it's awaiting someone else, and the wires are being crossed somehow and I am receiving something not even directed towards myself?

Now I don't know if this thing is an inward loop of fear, or if someone is messing with my mind signals, maybe an inner voice or "something(or someone) that is intervening" with my processes in life in general. To be brutally honest, I feel it is the latter! I must also note though, there is also another voice saying "their intentions are to love me"...See I keep getting mixed messages and mixed signals that can be a bit confusing to the brain in this all to mixed up thought process.

Honestly though, there is so much chaos out there in this whole entire world that saddens me. I often wonder if I am the only one, experiencing these add feelings and receiving such odd impressions. Something within me says "I'm not the only one", but another part of me doubts that and asks "Why me?"

I had a dream once (Okay, maybe more than once), where everyone had to leave on a big cargo plane, because where we were, was going to be attacked or in some kind of danger or plagued or something like that. Everyone, including my children and other loved ones/friends. They were all boarding this plane, BUT I said NO, I said I wasn't getting on the plane! This cargo plane was like the ones you see animals transported to their countries, after being in captivity. BUT...It was one of those huge ones, that they have enough room for elephants and big animals like that. This was very odd though, people were boarding from land while this plane was in the water. Which strikes me as odd, because everyone walked from ground and than walking through water and boarding the plane that way. It was a very odd looking plane for a cargo plane. People entered the back, like animals...through this large drop down back door. If you can picture that.

Anyways I always think about that dream, I had it so many years ago, but I always ended up getting myself left behind while everyone I loved and everyone else, left to go to safety. I always ask myself why I wouldn't go, it's as if I wasn't ready to move on or to leave my home and place I love. I'm still unsure to why I had this dream and usually I am pretty good at figuring them out, after thinking them over.

I don't have aids. It's a more complicated illness and I care not to explain! Maybe I have this strong emotional attachment to life that keeps me going.....Anyways...
Loving you all and thinking of you and the world deeply lately.
Unknown Sender

I know you're watching!!

Here's a few things I've also learned a long the way in my life span through out my life with personal experience of course!

"What I've learned long ago, about the dark.
It's like being blind!
You don't, look.
You listen!"

"Generally, if you stop for a moment.
Pay attention to your surroundings,
And be sure, that there is nothing out of place,
If something is out of place,
You're either being watched,
Or, you just better walk fast out of there,
Without thinking about if you are or not!"

"Somethings, just aren't as they seem!"

"You better fear god, because hell, is over rated in this world!"

"Once someone breaks trust, it's almost impossible to gain it back again!"

"Even your own blood, will turn their backs on you."

"I'm not the only one being watched!!!"

Be well

I'm on a clock that ticks constantly now, and I wait for when it stops!

Unknown

Symbols and personal meanings...part6.. FINAL PART!

Hello and here we are on to the final part of this image. I have decided to put the image in full view here on the last part, so that you can see them all together and see the sequence in with they follow to the next.

hope you enjoyed this post and have read the previous postings as you can bring them all together in order to see more

Symbols and personal meanings...part5

Hello again, and for those new here please refer to PART1 in order to follow with each part.

This is a short one but I feel it is full of information!

18.) As stated in our previous post

Symbols and personal meanings...part4

Hello again everyone, and here is the next part of my symbols!

So far we have covered the first have of the symbols from the 3rd imagine on THIS PAGE, and as stated before, I have split it up into sections so it is easier to explain it a bit more per posting, so as to night fill one big post with a whole lot of information. I feel the reading all in one post alone would be a bit overwhelming to look at and perhaps make others run away because it is so much.

14.) A box with an X

Symbols and personal meanings...part3

Here we are on to another day and more symbols to figure out! 

If you have been following my blog lately, you will know that I have been posting about my personal symbols experiences in life for the past 4 years, and probably more, but hadn't realized it!

These symbols are all sources of direction in nature. As you can see, some symbols are personal creations on their own.

10.) Is an up arrow, it is stronger in the sense of it's drawing (meaning it stands out above the rest!) I believe it means rising above. I might also note that an arrow could mean sulfur in many alchemy symbols.

11.) This is the alchemical symbol for decompose, as well as an A, and and angle of about 45 degrees southwest.(Not sure what that would mean) And it also being the 11th symbol could have it's hidden meaning for me. You can ignore that note though! 

12.) An arrow pointing southeast.

13.) An arrow pointing northwest.

Now if there were more to these symbols, I'd certainly add them.

Thanks for viewing my blog!
Part 4

Blessings to you all. Feel free to send me a comment and I will get back to you!

Symbols and personal meanings...part2

Hello again everyone!

Here is another section of the images posted HERE and HERE..And as you can see so far I have not mentions too much on full meanings of each meaning, as I know you could research those things on your own. Symbolic meanings change for everyone! With this in mind please refrain from judgement of my interpretations of these symbols, and if you should find them anywhere else I did not steal them!.

6.) This symbol

Symbols and personal meanings...part1

Hello everyone I am sorry to keep you waiting.

I have split the image of my symbols up in sections going down that image! And I am making a separate blog post for each select section of that image! Which means each day you'll see a section of said image with an explanation of that sections symbolic contents!

Here is the first section for you today!

1.) Is the #18, it also can symbolize two directions colliding (up and down). Lets say it's like gravity, when things fall it seems as if the down collides with what is down. If you know what I mean. This symbol could also mean month in alchemy.

2.) Is obviously a +(plus) sign,

It's been busy!

I am very sorry I have been away for a bit, I do plan to break up the 3rd and last picture on my last entry in order to explain each one enough for understanding.

With this in mind, I want to thank ya'll for your patience!

Thanks for visiting and have a peacefulled rest of the week.

Sorry for my absence! Images, Symbols and meanings! A short introduction!

Sorry for my absence everyone. I have really been wondering how to go about posting my symbols.

Do I post them as just pictures so you can see what I have?

Do I post the pictures as well as "my" meanings for them?

You know because I really feel most of these meanings were only meant for me. (Notice I didn't say all of them?) I know I haven't really been posting much useful blogs lately, but I really do wonder on how to go about things and posting my personal symbols online.

In this first image I'd like to point out I am still a bit confused on what it is suppose to mean. As I may have stated in previous posts, I get my symbols mostly as mind impressions. I think it might be religion  based, as to maybe.

This second image has many meanings, some involve time relation and others have a personal meaning! 

1. Obviously means a signs! 

2. means different angles and something I still haven't quite got yet, I believe higher resonance? Like I said I am still learning. These digital symbols had been put away and as of right now, they are easier for me to post. 

3. Means half of a life. This is just personal, and means something to me. 

4. Is the time thing I was talking about, time turns and there are many tools involved to find a way. 

5. Is still a bit confusing, I know mountains, but I think is also (with the line going in through center) may mean split in have or in between. Still a bit confused on this one too. I worked more with the symbols I wrote/drew on paper because I always had it on hand. 

6. Is either math related or symbolic for a rune from history. I was also studying runes and other religious symbolism because I was confused on all the symbols I was given as mind impressions. 

7. I think it just means windows, like windows of opportunity, or windows in a home, really you'd have to see it as a personal symbol to know it's meaning for you.

This third image has so many symbols in it that I would have to make it a long post! I just want to post it for you all to see. I plan to explain this last image in more detail later and in a few separate posts.

As you can also see each image was done in 2009, but I placed the copyright park on it today. That's why it says 2012, this is a newer blog for me so I am placing the copyright mark for now. There are many symbols and they all have their own meaning, within each individual one. I plan to explain each symbol later, maybe a post for about 4 or 5 in each(symbol) blog posting for easier understanding and not a huge one blog posting as to overwhelm the mind, that might be reading/viewing it!

Thanks for your patience in waiting for me to post about my symbols, I do plan to add more later one, but this is like a blog post to show I am not full of it! My symbols discussed before are real and here is proof.

Enjoy your weekend!!

Just some random words I wrote on paper almost a year ago ago!

August/30/2011

"Your silence, speaks louder than you think,
I see each thought you keep in everything I see, and all that I read,
Sometimes it's overwhelming,
It's so amazing...mm..mm,
How you open my eyes,
And never forgotten,
You're never forgotten..."


 "I swallowed all of my pride,
And I stepped out of the lines,
And found me!,
I like all that I see,
Even everything...all around me."


"You don't have far to go...from here,
You don't have to keep making yourself clear,
You're already there...for me,
You're already there....can't you see?"

A new poem for today...Let's call it strange and maybe enlightening!

"Defeated fears and questions of love" By Unknown Sender

Swirling vortex of thee obis,
Trying to make up for time I've missed,
Nothing beats a wonderful first kiss,
Only a few years ago...Yes it only what I miss,

My heart compelled to linger on,
Oh how it use to swell knowing when people were gone,

My senses heightened to ever lengths,
Across court yards the smell of  dirt and flowers with such strength,

Wandering down each path alone,
Learning with each season as each plant has grown,
I smell everything now,
Even the smell of the sea,
Waves crashing against the shore, I smell it from miles away...can't you see?

The swirls are so strong right below,
I have to look away,
For they make me sway,
So high up I feel just now,
With all those whirling pools,

I smell their swells,
I feel the rush of their strength,
Even though I am so high above,
It's sounds deafening,
So deafening, even the traffic can't drowned it out!

I suddenly realize I'm walking too fast,
This was the first time I walked the bridge "I just passed"...
Yet on my way back, I still walked it to fast!
But the second time, my mind wandered...
I wasted much time, just in the ponder..pondering what? Too many things

But I defeated a fear...Of height and of bridges over troubled waters!
Their swirls and whirls use to scare me so...
But now that I am older,
Those fears are so easily let go!

I still dream and remember each of those kisses,
I keep lots to myself..Even thoughts of my wishes,
But you know what?
I still miss those kisses,
Because each one was like the first...
Now that is a first!

A first for REAL love,
But now it lingered on it's way,
I never feel important enough to them,
I must say,

At first it was wonderful,
At first it was unlike anything in this world,
Thought it was my soul-mate,
But I guess I must be wrong,
Because they are never with me,
Even though these feelings and beliefs still beat strong.

So what is a soul-mate you ask?
Someone you're so connected to...
Never mind. That's to painful and too much to ask!

Just enjoy the natural things that are in this world,
The perfectly UN-perfect world, that we all sit upon.

Just something on the moments chimes...

Here is something very strange and odd I felt like typing up just out of the blue! Feeling quite rhyme-like and poetic and a bit Gothic as well. Hope you like it :-) I felt I had to post something :-)


"The witch, crows and the world who knows" By Unknown Sender April/30/2012


In walks the world with her new found place,
A simple little world with a queen like face,
All wrapped up for the cold and a sense of grace,
Pushing back old memories that give that sour taste,

Rivers flow like magic,
Winds blow like racket,
Sands uplifted from the static,
Sun shines through all the masses,

Scattered are the crows,
Almost summer yet still snows,
Up and down she goes,
Every winds a blows,

Fixed eyes towards the skies,
Every memory survives,
Learning as it flies,
The broom that she rides,

Crows that holler,
Unknown Callers,

Send negatives to the universe,
Thrown demons back deep into the Earth,
Queen she is their master,
Boss of ever after,

She screams, but from on within,
She Yells to them so whispery,
Her silence is so loud they can not help but hear,
Can not drown it out,
The sound that screams within,
"Do as you're told" She says...
"Or I'll send you back to them"...

The screams of hell are deafening,
You can't deny the truth,
Trust me you'd not like it there,
Twas visited in the youth,

Better choose the good side,
Cause Hell is not a good ride,
Hell is worse than life at it's worse,
I sure hope you heed these words!

Some old writings...Two poems from 2009

Here is something I wrote a long time ago...

The best gift... March 12 2009

The best gift you ever gave me...

"You couldn't have came at the better time,
I thought my life was over and felt very bad,
At first I was confused and unfocused,
Had been crying so long,
I thought I'd never see you again,
But I opened my door,
And you showed love once more...

I wanted to love you so much more,
I wanted to dance in the moonlight,
Scream out your name,
Hope you felt the same,
When silence was broken,
And so many words unspoken ...outloud,
You'll always have me,
I'm only yours and I'll always have these....
Times are precious with you,
I know my love is true,
But only for you!

I hope you'll have me again,
I hope you'll stay mine til the end,
My love is so strong this very moment,
I hope our love will move on, so strong
Until I die!

To my love

------------------------------------
Another written right afterwards

"More little things"  March 12 2009

Just something in my head!

It's the little things you do,
That keeps me moving on,
The little things to you,  are big things to me,
You show me many things,
That I can't ignore,
You show me everything,
Even if it hurts me more,
But I can see the truth,
Yes I can see through you,
All I see is you,
In everything and everyone,
Yes everything reminds me of you!

Just when I think it's done,
You show me love in small things one by one,
You opened my eyes to the world,
I do things I never thought I could,
I showed you I am good!

I see myself everyday,
Even if I am afraid,
Sleep deprived by myself,
I did create!

But here I am waiting still,
Patiently ....

Here is a dream I had a few years ago, I still remember most of it like I had it yesterday!
I hope you enjoy, I kind of tried to write it with a poetic twist.

August 09 -2009 "Dreams..." - Unknown Sender


I've always liked them because they usually tell you things...everyone needs there rest.....so glad to have finally gotten my dreams back.

I was out somewhere with my friend, we were walking..no not hand in hand, but really close friends who can tell each other anything. I was doing the leading on that evening, for it wasn't night and it wasn't day...because the sun still shined but it was hidden away...

We walked to a monument, and we looked all around, in an unfamiliar place and some religious markings were on the ground, it wasn't sand, it wasn't time of snow...

I felt I had known the markings before...so I said "come on lets go" ...we looked further, we walked all the way...to "his" brothers place..there were books...papers..shoved where no one could see...I am not allowed there, because it don't feel clean..

When I looked in the cracks, I turned around ...there she stood looking sad..waiting for someone to come back...who was she, all done up nice, with dark brown hair, I didn't feel ice...

I know she must have had money because she wore really nice clothes, why she looked sad I'll never know...

But before I had got to that somewhat closed in spot..I looked on the ground..with some graceful thoughts, and what did I do?

"I didn't tell my best 'friend' the place reminded me of the one I still loved...because truthfully I never trusted that part of myself!" (But the place did make me happy for just that thought alone, because I knew how hard it was when you couldn't have a home)


"I rolled all over the religious markings that were carved there on the ground, wasn't sand it was stone. just tiny little blocks (lets say squares) were all on the ground, I didn't read them though, for a dream can show you every little thing, it only gives hidden keys...so you can wake up and remember certain things."

"I hope that the markings did feel my love that was given, just a feeling can save your life, if you want to be forgiven"

I really can't remember where I was, but it kind of felt like home, maybe another dimension is known...it was hidden right in the middle of the city...only that area is similar to my home. Just that one little space, I don't always seek the truth, sometimes it finds me. Because I do well with keeping myself hidden and clean, I'll never enter there, but will only in dreams..I'll seek truth...in my own special way. If you go looking, be sure to bring a friend, that loves you, for safety..before you venture in!

That was quite a dream!

VISIONS? Just your average DREAMS? Crazy? What are your thoughts?

June 21 2009 - old Journal entry:

Before dreaming...listen carefully to what is said and if you see anything
Just before falling asleep I usually get startled and awaken kind of. Not really asleep yet but like in between, in between worlds lets say..It is quite busy there, busier than my mind which is saying a lot.
For an example:
Yesterday or last night rather, I heard a couple people talking, now I didn't hear everything that was said but what I did get was this - "Where is the evidence?"

Now I know that isn't saying much, but doesn't it bring questions in your mind?

Another one I had yesterday morning....as I couldn't sleep...I heard another couple talking, I can't remember it fully I am trying to though...I see a young woman about my age(29), a very close to the head haircut and she was brunet and well A guys voice (who I couldn't see for some reason) said either "Darrin' Erin" or "Farrin' Erin" And she said in reply "Just Erin is fine thank you!" but she said it in a way as she was not offended by what they said, just simply implying that just her general first name is fine to call her!

There have been many other times like this in the past which always makes me wonder where it all comes from...is it just my mind being strange? Is it some other dimension unknown to others? Is it real time somewhere else? Is it future conversation for someone else somewhere else?

Who really knows what these things I have are but I have always questioned them.

A question I always ask myself "What's wrong with me?" Why do I get these things, why do I get hunches that keep me from leaving my house at certain times? Why do I hate going to the mall so much? lol..I know the answer to that one.

Too many people with too many vibes and feelings all in one place make me feel panicked or uneasy or I even get moody, peeved off, for no reason at all! I feel like laughing at some points and say to myself "WTF was that for?" I it's hard to say....

I guess it all is a mystery and I love mysteries, so I'll always be listening, looking, thinking, questioning, and also trying to help those beyond who will allow me to see what they want as long as they give me proper help or clues to go with it. I try my best, as I know that is why god made me. I am not religious, but I do believe God exist some place. He is also good and evil so be careful what you do as he sees it all, my advice "Think twice!" or more if you have to, take patience in thinking things through and don't be so eager!